Hey AFS,
Wow. It never ceases to amaze me as new people are on here all the time, how many things there are in common. So here are a few of my musings. I too have young children (not 5). :)
So just afew off the cuff thoughts. the more you learn, the more you will want to tell others. Hold off on that. The desire will subside with time.
Focus instead on your husband and children. Even with a thin thread tot he hall, you never know who may just dive in with eyes wide shut, and start shunning you a decade or two from now. the teachings are not harmless. Think of just two, blood, and shunning. How much harm is done there? You are allowing yourself to research, just look here. thousands of people with broken families. Make yours the priority. Everything else should come from that.
Next, right now you are a bit miffed because of primarily social issues. People being jealous, gossiping, etc... But those are local issues. Just move to Orange County, CA or west side of LA, and those issues go away. The REAL issues are the culture and doctrinal structure of a fundamentalist end time religion. It doesn't have to break your belief in God, but for me it certainly has. I no longer can accept things such as the flood myth, and I make no excuses for Gods supposed behavior in the OT that is far worse than any murderer i have ever heard of.
Still......I'm not sure where that takes me.
And that brings me to that last point. Don't feel like you have to do.......anything. You don't have to jump into some other belief system. You don't have to accept some other faith, or ditch the concept of a creator, or even feel like you must still believe in one. Allow yourself access to all information, and research. It sounds like you are doing that already.
Ride the roller coaster, and check in. We understand, and it helps to talk to peopl who understand. Welcome to the board.